Click to find out more

Men At Work

workingdadWHAT THEY WANT AND WHY IT MATTERS TO WOMEN

The 100% Project is a not for profit organisation that wants to see 
100 percent of Australia’s leadership talent, female and male, equally contributing to our social and economic future. We exist because women are under-represented on most Boards and in the senior management teams of most Australian organisations.

We have to engage men if we are to achieve meaningful change – because men run most of the businesses and organisations where change is required and organisational culture is generally defined in male terms.

But what do men actually think about their role at work and at home?

Do they want the work-life balance more often seen as something women want? Do they feel they can take advantage of flexible working? And if they don’t, will women continue to miss out on their fair share of senior positions?

These are questions The 100% Project set out to explore in its latest research report, ‘Men at Work: What they want and why it matters for women’ published in September 2011.

Here’s what we found:
Men want to spend time and energy on their family life
75 percent of men surveyed expect to devote a significant amount of their time and energy to rearing their children.

And family is more important to them than their career
68 percent of men are willing to accept costs to other areas of their life so they can be involved in the day-to-day care of their children.

They want a rewarding career – but they won’t sacrifice everything for it
83 percent of men expect to devote significant time to building their career – but only 29 percent of men expect to make as many sacrifices as necessary to advance their career.

Men want work-life balance – and say their life as a whole is better if they get it
62 percent of men who are satisfied with their life as a whole agree that their work-life balance is right for their current situation. Only 14 percent of men who are not satisfied with their life think that their work-life balance is right.

MEN ARE NOT GETTING WHAT THEY WANT…

They work harder if their employer encourages work/family balance
– even if they themselves don’t take advantage of work/life balance programs 79 percent of men who say they are engaged at work agree that their employer encourages employees to strike a balance between their work and family lives. Only 49 percent of non-engaged men agree with the same statement.

Men don’t ask for greater work-life balance, even if they have children, because they think asking will harm their career
Only 39 percent of men have asked for greater work-life balance at some time in their career. The top reasons for this include the belief that such a request would have negative effects on their career and that employers look negatively on employees who take advantage of work-life balance initiatives.

And women pay the price because men aren’t getting what they want
The women we surveyed are just as committed to their careers as men. But if men don’t feel they can request the work-life balance they want, then women will continue to carry most of the burden of maintaining a home and raising the children.

As they can’t share this burden, more women than men will continue to ask for flexible working arrangements such as part-time work.
This will perpetuate the inaccurate view that these initiatives are only for women who are not committed to their careers.

Working long hours in full time jobs with little flexibility may not be what all men want, but it gives them an advantage over many women in winning appointment to senior positions. It also contributes to the unhealthy culture of long working hours with rigid role structures in many Australian organisations.

We can see the price that women pay for this in not making it into senior leadership roles.

Giving men real opportunities for flexible working will:

• Enrich their work and family life
• Improve their job satisfaction and engagement at work
• Enhance their overall sense of well-being, and
• Help open up opportunities for women as well.

Failing this, the leadership opportunities open to Australian women will not improve, remaining significantly lower than in other developed nations – and men will continue to miss out on meaningful time with their families.

We acknowledge The 100% project for this research.
They would like to thank Partners and Sponsors who made this research possible: Principle launch partner – Australia Post, Research Partners – School of Psychology, Deacon University, Media Communication Partners – Reputation, Launch sponsors – PCW, Able and Baker, People Measures.

3 Assertive Ways to Get More Time with Your Kids

3 assertive ways to get more time with your kids

As a dad, one of your biggest challenges is probably finding more time to spend with your kids.

Each day only has 24 hours and there is nothing you can do about that, which means that the only way to find more time for your kids is to redirect time you spend on other activities.

I am willing to bet that one of the highest demands on your time comes from your job, along with any auxiliary activities it entails such as preparation, commuting and so on. Well, your job also presents the best opportunity to redirect time and thus have more time to spend with your kids.

Now I realize this is easier said than done, which is why I’d like to actually show you 3 effective techniques you can use to make this happen.

All these techniques revolve around the concept of assertiveness. To be assertive means to put taking care of your needs first and to express yourself openly in your relationships with others, but from a position of respect towards others, not aggressively.

Assertiveness is something you can use in your career to effectively free up time and not let your job overwhelm your finite time resources. Here are the 3 specific ways you can do this:

1. Practice Saying “No”

You probably end up dedicating a lot more time to your work than you’d like to, because others in the workplace ask for it and you just don’t say “no”.

Your boss asks you to stay overtime repeatedly and each time you agree, even though you don’t really want to. Some of your colleagues ask you for help regularly and you end up working late in order to help them get their job done, even though you’d prefer they do it on their own. And thus, you give others big chunks of your time.

This has to change. You need to deliberately practice politely but firmly saying “no” when people at work make demands on your time. Not all the time, just some of the time, when you believe you’re entitled.

I know refusing a request involving your time may be hard for you right now. My advice is to take it gradually. Say “no” to small requests first, and progressively move up to more important requests. Also, always bear in mind that your time is important and you have the right to not give others in the workplace more of your time than your job responsibilities demand.

The more you practice saying “no” and the more you apply this mindset, the easier it gets to say “no”.

2. Try to Obtain Work-From-Home Days

If you would work from home some of the time and eliminate part of your daily commute, you would surely be able to spend a lot more time with your kids.

And doing at least some work from home is very likely possible in your job logistically speaking. All you need to do is get your employer to allow it.

Personally, I’ve coached several clients and helped them convince their employer to let them work from home 1, 2 or 3 days per week. The essential thing is to ignore any doubts you may have and actually go to your manager and ask them for this. And have a few persuasive arguments why they should approve your request.

You may feel some social awkwardness when doing this. It’s because you’re making a request of a superior that you’re not used to. Trust me: it will be fine. Ignore the awkwardness and do it.

Ideally, at first just suggest your manager to let you work one day per week at home for a couple of weeks, just as an experiment. If that goes well and your productivity stays the same or it actually improves, then you have a case for asking to make this permanent. Then perhaps to add one more work-from-home day, and then even another.

If your manager sees that you working from home doesn’t cause any problems, they value you as an employee and they know this is something important to you, you’re very likely to pull it off and end up doing part of your job from the comfort of your own home.

3. Find a Better Employer

Sometimes no matter how much you try to say “no” and you endeavor to negotiate the use of your time at work, you still can’t free up too much of it.

The dynamic of the company you work for is of such a nature that it constantly puts a high demand on your time and you have little control over this. Maybe you’re in an organization with a lot of emphasis on hard work and little respect for family life, or you have very rigid managers and colleagues; who knows?

Fortunately, if you’re a professional who has a lot to offer, it shouldn’t be too hard for you to find a job in a company with better conditions and less strenuous demands on your time. You will need to be proactive though: search for jobs, send your resume and go to interviews. A better job won’t just fall in your lap. But as long as you take action diligently, results will happen.

The key idea to consider is that you deserve to have a decent amount of time to spend with your kids. Your work isn’t your entire life, it’s only a component of your life, and you have the right to put some clear boundaries on how much time you’re willing to invest in your work.

Do your job well and show commitment to it, but don’t let it absorb all your time and suck the life out of you. That’s what being assertive is all about, and that’s how you find more family time.

Guest Writer: Eduard Ezeanu coaches people who are shy and helps them become more outgoing, both in personal and professional situations. He believes that social confidence is a key factor in having a fulfilling life. You can read other articles from him on his two blogs, People Skills Decoded and Art of Confidence.

Be intentional – don’t let work rob you of time with your kids

intentionalFor some dads, an effort is made to maintain a fine balance between work and family since they consider them intertwined and equally important.   Just as you can’t be with your children 20 hours per day and hold a job, or spend 20 hours per day at work and be an effective dad, occasional compromises between work and family are required to maintain a happy medium.

For these dads, keeping work and family equal is a matter of pragmatism.   On an emotional or ideal basis they believe that family is the higher priority.  They believe that fulfilling their role as a father includes being a good provider, in fine balance with family life. They are defensive of family time, being intentional in their efforts to not let work rob their kids and family of time with their dad.  One dad adjusts his shifts so he can spend more time with his kids.  He’ll swap shifts to be at home even for a brief period at dinner time when he can ask the kids about their day.

A fathers loveAnother dad, a teacher, goes into work early so when he comes home in the evening his family has his full attention. Some dads maximize precious family time by including their kids in everything they do or wherever they go outside of work.  Rather than stay in a job that intrudes into family time and is inflexible, many of these dads look for a new job that enables family time. These dads aren’t immune from the challenges of separating career and family priorities. In practice they are willing and intentional in their effort to compromise as best they can keep their career and family roles balanced.

Unless a dad is independently wealthy and doesn’t need to work, it is normal for him to be confronted with conflicting priorities of work and family. How the father addresses the balance of work and family has significant positive or negative ramifications for all stakeholders; himself, his family, and his employer.

For many separated dads, time becomes even more precious, the need to continue earning is a heightened because finances are stretched. Many dads that have a fortnightly or 50/50 access agreement take intentional action to ensure that nothing gets in the way of their time with their children. Work shifts, social engagements get pushed aside over having access with their children. For this group of dads, career and promotion opportunities are often missed and social friends disappear but from the value they get from fathering they would not have it any other way.

Father and Son.The father’s behavior will in large measure be based on his sense of control, the flexibility of his job and family, and his willingness to engage in healthy compromise and boundary setting. Work and family will be out of balance when boundaries are absent or not enforced. Poor boundaries created by an out of balance condition can be generated by the father, or in some cases inflexible demands of the family, the job or the employer.

Focus on the children can help fathers by raising their awareness of the factors necessary for a healthy work/family balance. Since families need to eat, there may be periods of time where it is the father’s duty to tolerate a work/family imbalance. On the other hand, many fathers may actually be promoting the condition by poor boundary setting or failing to research and pursue different job opportunities that may be available. With the many conflicting priorities inherent to work and family demands, the issues surrounding work/life imbalance can be a significant source of stress to fathers and their families.

Travelling with children: on a road trip

traveling with childrenAnyone with young children will know that whilst holidays are a fantastic opportunity to ‘get away from it all’ and spend quality time together.  Sometimes the stress of the journey to get there can make you question whether it’s worth all the effort!

Car journeys become arduous tasks filled with cries of ‘are we nearly there yet’ and numerous toilet stops, and travelling by public transport can be an embarrassing experience, particularly if your children take a liking (or dislike) any of your fellow passengers.

Here is a handy guide to keeping your little ones happy and content during the journey to and from your destination:

Communication

Taking the time to talk to your children about where you’re going before you set off is a great idea.  Explain to them in simple terms how long the journey is likely to take (for example, it’s a little bit further than grandpa’s house).  If they’re old enough, show them a map of where you’re going and talk about the journey, and some of the sights they’re likely to see during the journey.

In Car Entertainment

Children have a very short attention span so having a few interactive and interesting games up your sleeve to play during the journey is essential.  Traditional games like eye spy and the number plate game are still popular, but be creative!  Why not all take it turns to make up part of a story, or play a guessing game – the list is endless.

Alternatively, on-board DVD players and handheld games consoles offer a good way to keep little ones happy and content.  CD’s of your children’s favourite stories are also popular ways to keep both children, and parents calm and entertained.

Keep Refreshed

One of the most common complaints from children when travelling is that they are either hungry or thirsty.  Stopping at service stations to re-fuel can work out costly, and you will then often be limited to sugary snacks and drinks that wont help to keep your children calm!

Fill a box with healthy snacks, such as bread sticks, fruit, cheese and flapjacks, and pack several bottles of water or fruit juice.  These should keep the hunger pains at bay.

Be Flexible

When you have children, gone are the days of having a set agenda where you leave the house, and reach your destination at a set time.  Children have their own agenda, and with all the best will in the world you need to be flexible to deal with the unexpected – or allow yourself lots of extra time. 

Being flexible and prepared should take the stress out of dealing with emergency or unforeseen situations.  Organising your insurance through a reputable and helpful company like Expedia means you’ll be covered should the unexpected happen.  

ABSENT – Documentary

ABSENT documentaryFilmmaker Justin Hunt will be joined by musician-composer James Hetfield in presenting and discussing the award-winning documentary Absent, exploring the worldwide crisis of absent and disengaged fathers and the negative impact that the “father wound” makes on society.

Weaving interviews with participants who speak from observation and personal experience, the film includes on-camera testimony from author John Eldredge, World Champion boxer Johnny Tapia, fitness model Robin Decker and James Hetfield, best known as co-founder of Metallica. “The father wound is so deep and so all-pervasive in so many parts of the world that its healing could well be the most radical social reform conceivable,” says Father Richard Rohr, and this film makes a strong case that this issue is central to the human condition.

Talking about James Hetfield’s involvement with the movie, Rockville Music Magazine published an exclusive interview with the film’s director Justin Hunt.

I am currently in the process of arranging a screening for all Dads Online friends and supporters around Australia. stay tuned!

 

Kids and Health Insurance

kids and health insuranceDivorce changes a lot of things in your family unit, but it does not change one of the major goals that parents often desire to achieve: the ability to raise your children in a way that puts their mental, emotional, and physical health first. Before your divorce, you and your spouse worked as a single unit to protect and provide for your children. Now you must work as separate units, all-be separate units that agree at times, to care for your children.

Private and public health insurance is one vital area that helps you and your ex encourage physical and emotional health in your children.

Medicare
The nice thing about Australia’s healthcare is that it already provides basic health care necessities for parents and their children. Tax and government funded Medicare provides you with a means to provide basic health insurance for your children at a free or reduced price. Medicare allows you to get your children:
• Free immunization shots.
• Free access to public hospital as a public patient.
• Cheaper access to public or private hospitals when you are a private patient.

If your child is a private patient you can decide when and where they will see a doctor. You will not need to wait hours or days on a wait list. When your children are private patients Medicare will pay for 75% of the Medicare Schedule fee.
• Some prescription drugs at a cheaper price.
Free or subsidized health care is a parent’s dream. Due to that fact, you may decide that you have no need for private health insurance. It is a valid choice, but you should be aware that public health insurance does not provide coverage for all necessary medical procedures. Medicare is great, but it is not perfect. Perfection would be financially unfeasible for any relatively free health care system.

Private Health Insurance
Although private health insurance provides basic health care for free or reduced prices, you still might decide to supplement your public health insurance with a private health insurance plan.

Hospital cover helps you pay for the portion of your health fees that Medicare does not cover:
• Ambulance rides.
• Rehabilitation fees.
• Theater fees that hospital charge you.
• The 25% not covered by the Medicare Schedule fee, as well as any additional money that you must pay for health care due to the fact that your doctor or hospital set their prices above the Medicare Schedule fee.

Extra cover provides you coverage for common medical procedures not covered by Medicare:
• Dental checkups.
• Glasses or contacts.
• Orthodontic Work.
• Prescription drugs.
• Physiotherapy.

If you feel that you can deal with surprise hospital visits alone, you might consider focusing any potential private health insurance on the extra coverage plans. While hospital visits may be few, the possibility that your children will need glasses, orthodontic work, or dental work is fairly high.

If you do decide that you want private health insurance, you should be aware that most of the insurance plans require a waiting period before you are able to make claims on your medical expenses. There will be a 6 month waiting period before any dental procedures and a 12 month waiting period before glasses and contacts are covered. You should not decide to sign up for health insurance because you want to save money on your purchasing glasses for your kid within the next week.

Single Parent Household Health Insurance
If you want private health insurance, but you do not believe it is economically feasible for you at this time. You should be aware that as a single parent, you are eligible for cheaper rates than you were before your divorce. Cheaper health insurance for single parent households is a development that came into effect in April of 2007. Before then single parent households were given the same monthly premium fees as families with two parents. If you are still struggling to pay for private health insurance with cheaper fees, you should consider requesting that your ex-wife pay for a portion of your monthly health insurance fees. If you are still negotiating your divorce, you could request that health care coverage be part of the child support that will be paid.

While health insurance is vital and private health insurance helps pay for some necessary medical procedures, you might be able to get by using Medicare. If you cannot handle another financial responsibility in your budget at this time, you may want to consider waiting for private health insurance. If you have the choice between superior health care and buying food for your kids, well the choice seems obvious to me. As parent’s you must do what you can to provide for your children, and one day you may be in a situation where you want afford to invest private health care for your children.

Parenting on a Low Income: Money Doesn’t Equal Love

parenting on a low incomeEvery parent wants to do a good job raising their kids.  Many parents with low incomes sometimes worry about how they can provide certain financial based items and activities to their kids. This can cause stress.  Will their kids be as happy as the children of wealthier parents?  Will their kids have to miss out on expensive extracurricular activities?  After all, what parent doesn’t want the best things for their children? 

If you’ve found yourself thinking these thoughts lately, rest assured that parenting on a low income doesn’t ensure an unhappy childhood for your children.  There are a variety of ways to enrich your little one’s life without spending a fortune.  With a little extra effort, your child can have a wonderful and full childhood.

 

  • Your attention is the most valuable thing your can give your child.  More than they want the latest toy or gadget, your children desperately want your love and attention.  Listen to them as they tell you about their days.  Take the time to watch as they explain the features of their favorite toy. 
  • Arrange for play dates with other children.  Many kids’ favorite memories are of the times they spent with their friends.  Want to build those same memories in your child?  Make sure that they have ample opportunities to get together with their friends or family.  Host two or three of your children’s friends for an afternoon.  If possible, let the friends’ parents reciprocate.  The kids will have fun and each parent will get an afternoon to themselves. 
  • Take advantage of all the things your local library has to offer.  Your local library can be a treasure trove of free or inexpensive activities for your children.  Most libraries have story hours for younger children.  In addition, many offer craft classes or other activities.  While you’re at the library, be sure to check out a travel guide or two about your own city; they are sure to highlight a variety of children’s activities in your area. 
  • Arrange a toy swap for your kids.  Ever notice how your kids love getting new toys?  As soon as the novelty wears off, though, many toys are left to collect dust.  Who wants to spend their hard-earned money on a toy that their little one plays with for a few days and then forgets?  A toy swap between friends or family members can be the perfect solution for this situation.  Invite a few friends over for the swap while requiring each child to bring a present that they no longer want.  (No broken toys please.)  Place each child’s contribution on a table, and let everyone select a new (to them) toy.  Everyone will leave with something new to enjoy without spending a dime. If you don’t have the family or friends, a great way to refresh your toys is to visit a Toy Library, there are over 160 libraries around Australia.
  • Consider secondhand options for necessary purchases.  Some expenses related to raising children can’t be avoided.  Clothing, for example, is a constant need for children as they continue to grow.  You can greatly reduce this cost, however, by turning to secondhand shopping options.  Shopping at Salvos store, resale shops, garage sales and even eBay can be a great way to keep your kids clothed in style for a bargain price.  As you shop, look for items that can fill other needs, too; toys, school supplies, and even electronics can often be found for less than half their original prices. 
  • Spend time on everyday activities: walking in and around parks playing ball games, take your basketball to the local court and shoot a few baskets, ride your bikes along the numerous bike paths, show your children a skill that you have learned like repairing a bicycle puncture, fixing a leaking tap, changing a light globe, brush and grooming the dog or cat, changing the cars window wiper blades.

 

What I have learnt so far…

simplify your lifeI have been a separated dad for over 25 years, twice over. Its something I am not proud of but I am proud of being a good dad. I have had two very different experiences. My first child was every second weekend, I did everything I could to be in her life – as much as I was allowed or welcomed.

My second experience is what every dad deserves, 50% shared parenting. It really is full parenting because it is only you that cares for them when you have them. In some cases you are providing more parenting duties than if you were not separated as the mums in some families take on more of the everyday care. 50/50 is a complete parenting relationship.

It is also an emotional roller coaster and I would not wish it on anyone if at all avoidable. The grief, the tears, the worry, the distraction, the lack of money, the joy and happiness all mixed into one and it feels like it is never ending.

I started thinking about what have I learned so far travelling this road for 25 years.

I have listed some of them below…

  • Allow an extra 20 minutes in the morning if you have girls so they can spend time on their hair. If you don’t there will be an upset!
  • I am the brekky king!  I believe it is an important meal of the day for us.  I get up early to ensure there is no rush.
  • I enjoy being active on weekends,  I plan activities but also plan down time i.e. time to lounge around and watch a DVD.
  • I have always had more fruit at home than sweets.
  • Yes more water than lemonade too.
  • We have been to McDonalds once in the last 12 months.
  • I’ve always put my children’s needs first when balancing time – because time flys.
  • I’m house proud and want a clean and tidy home for my children to come home to.
  • Reading before bed has served two purposes 1. Calms and relaxes 2. Quality time together
  • I cook 90% more than buy takeaway when I’m parenting.
  • Teaching the kids to value and look after their teeth is big at my place.
  • Over time I have collected a range of puzzle books and games to play at home on those rainy days.
  • I love to cook because its cheaper and healthier and I like to find different recipes the kids might like and experiment with different simple meals.
  • I learned early that our mental and physical well-being is paramount to being able to cope with everything that is going on. So I have always spent time on my own personal mental and physical  health with mediation, reading, walking, running and or gym. I reckon it has saved me!
  • I treat myself every now and then with something that make me happy for doing a good job with parenting. It’s a little like patting yourself on the back.
  • Being involved in parent teacher interviews have been great and keep me up to date on how the kids are tracking at school both academically and socially.
  • When going through separation, I simplified my life as much as possible, I didn’t take on new debt or change jobs – Bunkering down helps.
  • I’ve enjoyed travelling both overseas and locally with my kids, it connects us with fond memories and is fun to plan and wait for the holiday to come around.
  • Having the mind set that you have an equal share in parenting duties.  That means helping your child’s mother like taking extra time off work to help with school holidays and the student free days.  It just makes life easier for everyone and hopefully it’s reciprocated.
  • Generally I have found that a social life with other parents is pretty non-existent because there seems to be a stigma attached to a single dad!! But I have been able with some parents to Invite their children over for play dates and I have prepared lunch for the kids etc.  I always Invite the parents inside when they drop off so they see that it is a good environment to leave their children and that there kids are safe and well catered for.
  • Its not the army but I find kids operate much better and are happier with routine.  So, I have always tried to keep simple routine in place I.e. bed and meal times, reading, showering and arriving at school on time etc
  • I’ve tried to keep in touch with extended family, keeping family connections alive. If you don’t it can be a bit of a solo life, family are always there and friends are not.
  • There has been some fun and enjoyable moments which involved the kids cooking breakfast, lunch or dinner and even cleaning and shopping – I’ve tried to involve them in my day to day life.
  • Teach the kids to conserve energy and value the planet.
  • Be a good role model by not swearing or speaking badly of their mother in front of them if that is your situation. Don’t be afraid to fight behind the scenes for 50/50 parenting if you have to.
  • Be consistent in your moods around them. If you’re having a bad day relax and be present with the kids it really helps to keep things in perspective.
  • Remember whilst your kids are growing up they love you unconditionally.
  • Listen 70% and ask questions 30%
  • Be involved in your child’s life, they need you more than any materialistic item you could buy them. Make them a priority.
  • I always ended the night with a cuddle
  • You will find love again.

Doing the best you can does not always guarantee the love of your children when they get older. However, it does give you peace of mind that you have done the best your could, with what you were given.

Negotiate Your Way to a Better Deal

negotiate a better dealPeople often associate negotiations with deals between companies or purchases but in reality, the average person makes dozens of negotiations every single day. Whether it’s discussion with an (ex)spouse, pleading with children, or coming to a consensus on dinner plans with friends – negotiating is a part of everyday life.  While everyone inevitably engages in some form of negotiation, not everyone is skilled at it. Luckily, it doesn’t require years of business classes to become a great negotiator. And the benefits of becoming a great communicator can be tremendous. Keep the following things in mind for future negotiations.

Preparation

Regardless of the focus of your negotiations, you must do extensive research beforehand. For example, if you begin negotiations to purchase a used car but you haven’t researched current market prices for the make and model in question, the seller is going to spot your lack of preparation and take advantage of it. The seller could set the starting price much higher than current market prices suggest, playing off of your ignorance. Preparation also involves knowing exactly what it is you want out of the deal and defining your bottom line. Writing these things down before you begin negotiating can act as a control which will prevent you from making unwise decisions in the heat of the moment.

Honesty

Honesty really is the best policy in negotiations. Being dishonest or omitting certain information during a negotiation will only hurt you later on when the truth comes to light. Remember that the goal of any negotiation isn’t to force your opponent to take a bad deal, but rather to find a compromise that will be advantageous for both parties.

 Patience

Don’t let your own impatience drive you to take an undesirable deal. Negotiations that occur over long periods of time can actually be helpful since both parties have ample time to fully consider the consequences of the deal. On the flipside, negotiations with your children may not be long and drawn out but LOTS of patience may be needed.

Assistance

Don’t ever be afraid or embarrassed to ask for help. If the particular negotiation you are involved in has high stakes, it may be a good idea to consult an attorney, an expert negotiator, or simply speak with a trusted friend or family member. Consulting someone outside of the negotiation can give you a fresh perspective and potentially provide valuable insight.

 Options

Having a variety of options can work to your advantage in any deal. If you are planning on purchasing a home for instance, you should speak with several realtors about different locations. Once you have been quoted prices for all of the possibilities, you can use the price ranges as tools of negotiation. Let all the realtors know that you have other options and will only accept the best deal. This provides leverage which ensures you will get a bigger discount in the end.

 Practice

Confidence is what you stand to gain through practice and it will go a long way in earning you a great deal. Before a big negotiation, use role plays to practice with friends, family, or co-workers. You can try out different negotiation tactics and see which ones suit your personality best and remember the old saying “You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar”

Good negotiation skills can mean the difference between a satisfied customer and buyer’s regret. Keep these tips in mind and you should find yourself walking away from your next negotiation with a smile and a great deal.

Is your teen at risk of a workplace injury?

Is your teen at risk of a workplace injuryGetting your first part time job is a proud moment in anyone’s life, and this will be no different for your teen.

Gaining some independence, developing life skills, and earning a bit of cash to spend on just about anything are some of the reasons first jobs are so exciting.

However, in spite of the huge number of benefits of young people working, a growing number of teens are finding themselves injured or, in the very worst cases, killed whilst at work.

Adolescents and young adults (aged between 15-24) suffer approximately twice the rate of occupational injuries as older workers. Experts believe teens may be more at risk because they have less work experience than adults, and may be less confident about speaking up about unsafe working conditions.

If your teen has just secured their first job, make sure you talk to them about identifying and minimizing their risks whilst at work:

Job Options

Help your teen to understand that different jobs carry different levels of risk.  For example a job laboring at a construction site is likely to carry a greater risk of physical injury than one in an office or shop.

Workplace Safety

Discuss possible safety issues and safety risks with your teen, and quiz them about what they believe to be dangerous working conditions.

  • Discuss work tasks
  • Find out what types of equipment and machinery they will use
  • Establish what types of protective gear (such as gloves, glasses and ear-plugs) is available to your child, free of charge, of he/she needs it.

In many cases teens just don’t recognize danger before it’s too late.  Make sure your teen has a good basic understanding of how to keep safe at work, and what their employer’s responsibilities are.

Check the employer

Consider visiting your teen at their workplace to assess the safety of the environment.  Avoid embarrassing them by keeping it light and informal – maybe meet them for lunch or a drink whilst you have a quick look around.  If your teen’s employer is a responsible person, they will understand your concerns.

Things to consider include:

  • Do most of the employees seem happy and satisfied?
  • Does the workplace seem reasonably safe?
  • Is the place of employment tidy and organized?

Claiming for compensation

If your teen is unfortunate enough to be injured at work, then there are a number of ways in which they can claim for compensation.  Remember the amount awarded will vary from state to state and it can be difficult for the average person to know their legal rights.

Speaking to a professional injury lawyer can make a big difference to any injury claim.

 

Things you might forget when planning a road trip

Things You Might Forget When Planning a Road TripOnce you have decided on that once in a lifetime road trip across the country, there is little you can do other than dream about your perfect getaway. But before you get lost in the clouds, come back down to earth and plan your trip properly before you go. This is ensure fewer obstacles and more time spent enjoying your adventure. Follow this simple guide and make sure you don’t forget anything important when planning your next road trip.

Things change

You may plan your trip down to the last minute and have your entire route committed to memory but the first rule of a road trip is; things change. You should always allow for some leeway here and there so that if things so go slightly awry, it won’t mess up your whole schedule.

Make a list

Pretty much everyone who plans a trip will make at least one list at some point. The problem is, if you forget something from the list, chances are you will forget it for your trip too. The best advice is to carry your list and a pen wherever you go in the months before your trip so that if you suddenly remember something, you can write it down there and then.

Research, research, research!

Whether you are planning your trip based upon logical, rational reasoning or throwing darts at a map, you need to research where and when you are going in advance. Some places will only be accessible during certain times of the year and weather conditions can affect your journey as well. It is best to spend a few hours researching each place you intend to visit so that you can work out a route that suits your needs best.

Appropriate clothing

If you are planning a summer trip, you are probably packing your shorts, swimwear and sunglasses, but take a moment and think about this. Are you going to be doing any activities that require special clothing? Indoor or artificial skiing will require proper clothing to protect you, while a stop-off in a major city may mean you want to wear something fancy for a night out.

Insurance and breakdown

Picking the perfect vehicle for your adventure is simple really, but finding the right insurance, breakdown cover and recovery service can be a nightmare. As well as being expensive, you need to make sure your insurance covers everything and everyone who is on the trip.

How to talk to your child about the News

how to talk to your kids about the newsNews gleaned from the TV, radio, or Internet can be a positive educational experience for kids. But when the images presented are violent or the stories touch on disturbing topics, problems can arise.

Events all over the world but recently in America such as the explosions at the Boston Marathon and the mass shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary School might naturally cause kids to worry that something similar might happen to them or their loved ones. It also can make them fear some aspect of daily life — like going to school — that they never worried about before.

Reports on shootings, attacks, natural disasters, and child abductions also can teach kids to view the world as a confusing, threatening, or unfriendly place.

How can you deal with these disturbing stories and images? Talking to your kids about what they watch or hear will help them put frightening information into a reasonable context.

How Kids Perceive the News

Unlike movies or entertainment programs, news is real. But depending on their age or maturity level, kids might not yet understand the distinctions between fact and fantasy.

By the time kids reach 7 or 8, however, what they see on TV can seem all too real. For some youngsters, the vividness of a sensational news story can be internalized and transformed into something that might happen to them. A child watching a news story about a bombing on a bus or a subway might worry, “Could I be next? Could that happen to me?”

Natural disasters or stories of other types of devastation can be personalized in the same manner. A child in Melbourne who sees a house being swallowed by floods from a storm in Brisbane may spend a sleepless night worrying about whether his home will be OK in a rainstorm. A child in Adelaide, seeing news about an attack on train station in Sydney, might get scared about using public transportation around town.

TV has the effect of shrinking the world and bringing it into our own living rooms. By concentrating on violent stories, TV news also can promote a “mean-world” syndrome and give kids an inaccurate view of what the world and society are actually like.

Talking About the News

To calm children’s fears about the news, parents should be prepared to deliver the truth, but only as much truth as a child needs to know. The key is to be honest and help kids feel safe. There’s no need to go into more details than your child is interested in.

Although it’s true that some things — like a natural disaster — can’t be controlled, parents should still give kids space to share their fears. Encourage them to talk openly about what scares them.

Older kids are less likely to accept an explanation at face value. Their budding skepticism about the news and how it’s produced and sold might mask anxieties they have about the stories it covers. If older kids are bothered about a story, help them cope with these fears. An adult’s willingness to listen sends a powerful message.

Teens also can be encouraged to consider why a frightening or disturbing story was on the air: Was it to increase the program’s ratings because of its sensational value or because it was truly newsworthy? In this way, a scary story can be turned into a worthwhile discussion about the role and mission of the news.

Tips for Parents

Keeping an eye on kids’ TV news habits can go a long way toward monitoring the content of what they hear and see. Other tips:

  • Recognize that news doesn’t have to be driven by disturbing pictures. Public TV programs, newspapers, or newsmagazines specifically designed for kids can be less sensational — and less upsetting — ways of getting information to children.
  • Discuss current events with your child regularly. It’s important to help kids think through stories they hear about. Ask questions: What do you think about these events? How do you think these things happen? These questions can encourage conversation about non-news topics too.
  • Put news stories in proper context. Showing that certain events are isolated or explaining how one event relates to another helps kids make better sense of what they hear. Broaden the discussion from a disturbing news item to a larger conversation: Use the story of a natural disaster as an opportunity to talk about philanthropy, cooperation, and the ability of people to cope with overwhelming hardship.
  • Watch the news with your kids to filter inappropriate or frightening stories.
  • Anticipate when guidance will be necessary and avoid shows that are too graphic and inappropriate for your child’s age or level of development.
  • If you’re uncomfortable with the content of the news or if it’s inappropriate for your child’s age, turn it off.
  • Talk about what you can do to help. After a tragic event, kids may gain a sense of control and feel more secure if you help them find ways to help those affected by the tragedy or honor those who died.

 

Thank you to Kidshealth.org for content.