‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house not a creature was stirring, not even your child.
A wonderful poem at Christmas time but its not always a wonderful time for some dads.
Christmas comes with expectations that we all should be happy and festive and for some it completely sucks!!
Christmas can trigger sad emotions in separated Dads and are very normal feelings under the circumstances
If you’re one of the dads that won’t be catching up with your children at Christmas time for reasons beyond your control, and feeling stressed and sad. We know it can awkward and sad and give you the Christmas blues. Start planning what you will do on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and even News Years Eve and News Years day if you’re not going to have the kids.
These particular days can trigger sad emotions in the best of us and are very normal feelings under the circumstances, don’t beat yourself up – Be kind to yourself.
We remember the days when we woke up on Christmas morning and gathered around the tree or the kids all came into Mum and Dads bed to give out presents and have a cuddle. But things are different now, your kids mum is now saying that Christmas Day the kids are staying with her? They are going away for Christmas? and you’re not on speaking terms to negotiate it.
You deserve to celebrate these days with or without them, so what will you do if you don’t have the kids?
Here are some ideas if your can’t think of some…
- Arrange to have the kids Boxing Day
- Call a friend to come over or meet them out somewhere that you like
- Visit a family member like brother, sister or relative to spend the day/night with
- Decorate your home and create a festive feeling for YOU.
- Do something that makes you happy
- Burn a scented candle and get your home smelling nice
- Play your favourite music
- Be selfless, volunteer at your local food bank to prepare and service Christmas meals and focus on helping others
- Have a day of exercise
- Binge on a Netflix series
- Turn off all social media
- Write out your goals for 2023 i.e. small (achievable), medium (need to focus) and large (Something to work at)
- Keep things simple
- Ask yourself “what can I do to make my circumstance happier”? then do that.
- Watch what you eat
- Don’t drink too much. Alcohol only makes you feel worse, so stay off it.
- Get your finances in order
- Paint that room or freshen up an area of your home that you’ve been wanting too.
- Catch up with someone on Zoom
If you need to boycott Christmas altogether, then just forget it even exists and go indulge yourself in what makes you happy without any guilt.
Let’s remember loneliness can effect many types of people at all times of the year
Let’s remember loneliness can effect many types of people at all times of the year. Some separated, divorced, elderly, disabled, isolated and domestic violence victims all experience loneliness, let’s have a thought for all of them and wish them the best for Christmas.
If you need to talk to someone phone Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Lifeline SMS – Chat Service on 0477 13 11 14
If you can add any more good ideas, please add them in the comments below…
For the classic poem of “Twas the night before Christmas”…click here
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