One of the best possible ways to influence healthy friendships for your child is to be aware of and involved in them. There is a fine line between being involved and being nosy, you need to make sure not to overstep those boundaries and make your child feel as if their privacy is being disturbed. One of the best good parenting tips is to maintain a positive presence and protective shadow in your child’s life and in their relationships. You should aim to keep an eye on these relations to ensure that these friendships, which are so fragile at a young age stay positive and healthy.
Not only this but by maintaining a positive role model image in front of them by only allowing healthy and positive friendships for yourself also, introduce your child to your friends and show them the importance of you both being involved (to a certain extent) in each other’s relations and being aware of who is who.
One of the easiest ways to do this is to open your home to your child’s friends. Let them feel comfortable in coming over and hanging out with your adult supervision in the background, this way you know what they are up to and it is an excellent way to get to know these new friends. When they are relaxed and in the mood to talk, you can get to know more about them.
However be sure to note your child’s reaction when you are talking to their friends, some children may feel comfortable and happy that you are taking an interest in their lives and friendships however some kids may not be too happy if you are being over friendly and taking the attention away from them. Stay friendly but don’t overdo it and intrude on their time together too much that your child’s guests or your child themself feels uncomfortable. It is important to note that when you take an interest in your child’s friendships, you are portraying a healthy message to your child that their friendships are important to you also.
It is important that you learn the names of your child’s friends, this way you will be able to keep up with all the stories your child has to share with you about their adventures. Not only this, but once you get to know their names and a little more about them, you can list their contact details and their parents contact information in your family address book.
Whenever possible, at school gates or when dropping kids off at each other’s houses, try to get to know the parents of your child’s friends also. By working with their parents you can ensure that your children’s friendships remain positive for all and you will most likely find that you both share the same concerns and values. This is a great way for you to also meet new people and increase your social life!
By getting to know other parents, this is an excellent route to face and possibly fix any issues your child may be having at school. Such as difficulties with a particular subject, if you find both your kids are having a difficult time you could arrange for them to be tutored together of if there are more serious issues then you can both speak to a teacher to express your concerns.
If your child’s school is hosting an event, try taking the time out to attend or stay a little longer when you go to drop your child off. Ask them to introduce you to their friends and ask questions; get to know them better so you can get a better impression of who they are.
Although some children who feel they are growing up may want to spend more time with their friends and less with family, you can change their mind by inviting their friends along too on your family getaways. You can get to know their friends and your child will be more than happy to spend time with you also.
However if you have younger children who are more fond of going to the park or having sleepovers, allow them do so or arrange fun events and get-togethers for them where you can supervise. You’ll find you’ll be having just as much fun as they are once you help arrange games and movies for them.
When it comes to birthday parties you can arrange fun surprise parties for them by inviting all their class members, this is a great way to help your child’s confidence also and help them make more new friends.
If you ever see your child’s friends out and about, try to go out of your way to give them a quick greeting. Many teenagers will actually appreciate seeing a familiar friendly face, especially if they are working somewhere.
Your child is safer if you know where they are, who they are with and if you befriend the parents of your child’s friends too, they can also keep an eye out and make sure your child is not overstepping any boundaries you have set for them. Some teens can be prone to making mistakes such as participating in drugs or taking up the company of unsuitable company, so by keeping an eye on this aspect of your child’s life you can help them make the right decisions and guide them in the right direction. Not just your own child, but of any other younger children that you befriend, who perhaps feel less comfortable talking to their own parents openly about any pressing issues.
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