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Providing for my son after separation.

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    12 months ago I became primary carer for our 2yr old son. 6 months ago I found out my wife has been seeing a lawyer trying to build an abuse case against me. 2 weeks ago she dropped a custody affidavit on me.

    We are separated but still living in the same house, I believed that this was the best thing for our son.

    My affidavit suggested we stay in those circumstances, but have mediation for how we operate finances, care of our son etc. She agreed to this at court.

    It is becoming obvious that she will not be happy until she has full custody and rides of into the sunset with our son to her new life.

    The further we go into this it is becoming a reality that I could in fact get custody, but I need to be able to provide a proper home for him.

    My issue and question is, “How do I afford that, if I cant work due to being his primary carer and cover rent and bills etc etc,”

    Is there anybody here who has made that transition and can give me some pointers? Does a single parenting payment from centrelink make it possible? Do I need to be in a community housing property? Other options?

    Your feedback is much appreciated.


    That’s a difficult one M8, I have often thought about that but I guess you would organise day care and drop him off in the morning and pick him up[ after work. Its a seriously full on role. FT carer needs to cook, clean and organise them every day and it can get overwhelming. But there is a sense of pride knowing that you can do it and have done it well. Other Men are lucky if they have parents that could pitch in and assist? Some dont want to be that involved because they have had there time raising you and its there time now. Others will happily mind their grandson for a couple days a week, the other couple can be in day care.

    Being a FT carer your work needs to be flexible as kids get sick and you will need to take time off. The best I feel is 50/50 so that you are caring for your son 50% of the time. Its a lot easier to manage and you get to take a breath. How did you go in the end? What did you work out?

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